Are you afraid of sex? Understanding Genophobia

Psychology Jul 28, 2021

Phobias are defined as an excessive and irrational fear reaction – in most cases, to something that’s unlikely to cause harm. There is a phobia for everything, and of course, sex couldn’t be any less.

Genophobia is the intense fear of sexual intimacy, also known as coitophobia or erotophobia. People with this phobia may be afraid of all sex acts, or only of intercourse itself.

How to identify it?

Phobias are a type of anxiety disorder, and as such, they go beyond not liking or being afraid of something. They can cause physical and psychological reactions that usually hinder the normal flow of life. Common symptoms include an immediate feeling of panic and anxiety when being exposed to the trigger, and even nausea, heart palpitation, or trouble breathing.

Genophobia can manifest in different ways, with some people being afraid to have sex altogether, including all kind of sex acts, while others may only fear certain aspects of sexual intimacy, such as penetration or physical contact.

For people with genophobia, the fear of sexual intimacy can be so severe that it can interfere with their ability to form intimate relationships or engage in sexual activities with their partners. They may experience physical symptoms such as sweating, shaking, or a rapid heartbeat when confronted with sexual situations, and they may avoid sexual encounters altogether to avoid triggering their fear response.

Consequences of sex phobia

The fear of sexuality in general can have serious psychological repercussions, including depression, low self-esteem, and feeling paralyzed in the face of sexual situations. These feelings may be compounded by internalized shame and guilt related to one's sexuality or gender identity. For example, a person whose religion prohibits premarital sex may feel extreme guilt when faced with opportunities for sexual encounters.

Likewise, people dealing with genophobia may also experience disruptions in their daily life. They may find it difficult to go out on dates, attend social gatherings, or even watch movies and television shows that involve sexual content. Moreover, this fear can cause them to become excessively paranoid about the potential for unwanted advances or contact from people they don't know. Other activities such as discussing sex with their partners might be a struggle, as well as communicating their needs and boundaries. That’s why it’s important to know what is genophobia, identify the root of the problem and treat it.

What causes genophobia?

Identifying what’s causing the phobia is crucial to seek the right treatment and to know how to overcome fear of sex. The causes of genophobia might include physical or emotional issues, but like all phobias, it’s most likely develop after severe trauma. However, upbringing and cultural or religious teachings can also increase the risk for this fear.

Vaginismus

This is a condition when the muscles of the vagina tense involuntary, making intercourse painful and sometimes even impossible. People experience it at the start of sex, while inserting a tampon or during a pelvic exam. Suffering from vaginismus can lead to being scared of having sex.

Physical factors such as infections, menopause, or surgery can also lead to vaginismus. Infections such as yeast infections or urinary tract infections can cause irritation in the vaginal area, resulting in muscle tension. Menopause can cause a decrease in estrogen levels, which can cause the vaginal walls to thin and become less elastic, leading to pain during intercourse. Surgery, such as a hysterectomy, can also cause pain and discomfort during sex due to changes in the vaginal anatomy.

Additionally, vaginismus can also be caused by the use of certain medications or substances. For example, some antidepressants can cause sexual dysfunction, including vaginismus. Alcohol and drug abuse can also lead to muscle tension and pain during sex.

The fear of pain or discomfort during intercourse can also perpetuate the cycle of vaginismus and lead to genophobia. Sufferers may avoid sexual activity altogether, causing strain on their relationships and even lead to feelings of shame or guilt.

Fear of sexual performance

Many people, especially those who are less experienced in bed, get nervous about whether they’ll be good and able to please their partner.

It can stem from various reasons, including lack of sexual experience or negative past sexual experiences. Individuals who are less experienced in bed may worry about not being able to satisfy their partner or not knowing what to do during sexual activity, which can cause anxiety and nervousness.

Similarly, individuals who have had negative past sexual experiences, such as sexual abuse or assault, may develop a sexual fear and may avoid it altogether.

Furthermore, societal pressure and unrealistic expectations can also contribute to the fear of sexual performance. With media portraying sex as something that is perfect and flawless, individuals may feel like they have to live up to these expectations, which can cause unnecessary pressure and anxiety. This pressure can be exacerbated by the fear of judgment and rejection, which can cause individuals to avoid sexual activity altogether.

It is important to note that the fear of sex related to sexual performance is not just limited to men. Women can also experience anxiety and nervousness about their sexual performance, especially in cases where they may have experienced pain or discomfort during intercourse.

In cases where these fears are severe, it may develop into genophobia.

Body dysmorphic disorder

BDD is a mental health condition characterized by obsessive thinking about a flaw on a specific part of the face or body that is often imagined or exaggerated in the mind of the person suffering it. The individual may spend hours each day checking and scrutinizing their appearance, and this can lead to feelings of extreme self-consciousness and anxiety.

For individuals with severe body dysmorphia, the fear of being physically intimate can be overwhelming. They may feel ashamed and embarrassed about their perceived flaws and worry that their partner will reject or judge them because of their appearance. As a result, they may be scared of sex and avoid sexual intimacy altogether or only engage in sexual activities with the lights off or under specific conditions, which can negatively impact their relationships and self-esteem.

A history of rape or past sexual abuse

One of the most common aftermaths of rape or childhood trauma such as child abuse, is post-traumatic stress disorder.

Individuals who have experienced sexual abuse or rape may experience a range of symptoms related to PTSD, such as anxiety, nightmares, and flashbacks. These symptoms can make sexual intimacy challenging or impossible, leading to the individual being afraid of sex and even avoidance of it altogether as sexual intimacy for them would be a way to relive the abuse. The fear of having sex can be so severe that it may cause significant distress and interfere with daily life and relationships.

It is crucial to note that sexual abuse or rape can affect individuals of all genders and ages. Moreover, the effects of sexual abuse or rape may be felt long after the event has occurred, making it essential for survivors to seek appropriate support and treatment to manage their symptoms and overcome their fear of sexual activity.

How to get rid of phobia of sex

If you’re struggling with genophobia and are scared to have sex, don’t feel alone – it’s more common than you might think. Your best shot is to go to a sex therapist. They are mental health professionals with advanced training in sexual matters, although most cases of genophobia can also be treated by traditional therapists. Cognitive-behavioural therapy can help you challenge negative thoughts about sexual intimacy, while exposure therapy and psychotherapy can help desensitize you to the fear.

A combination of therapy and medication might do it for most xenophobia patients. Prescription medication like anti-anxiety drugs or antidepressants can also ease physical symptoms.

However, is the cause for your fear of sex is vaginismus, you should seek medical doctor’s advice instead.

Dealing with the phobia of being touched sexually and battling genophobia is not easy, but know that the rewards of overcoming it are worth the hard process. If this is your journey, we want to let you know that you’ve got this!